Believing in God

When I was a kid, I was at constant fear of monsters, genies, Freddie Kruger and other scary things any kid can imagine. I guess it was normal to think like this because of age factor, living as a dependable creature to the elders of you and it was hard to explain the world around me with no experience nearly. I had no information about what is happening or why it happens?. So inexplicable world by the eyes of a kid, is full of danger and obstacles to stop me to do whatever I want, sleep where I wish. But of course by time it past. Now at this age, nobody should be in fear of monsters or other fearful things we afraid before. For me, its because of better understanding world and life by science and experience. I read a lot and traveled as I could. This gives me an edge to better analyzing the life around me.

During my late teens years, with the peer pressure and rebel mood developed inside me (it was actually hormonal thing for all teens) push me to questioning the existence of God or all holy things I got used to believe. My mother is a religious person while my dad is atheist. There was always conflict between my mom and dad when any subject religious opened. I sidelined with my mom generally. But dad figure of course, was for knowledge and power. Somewhere in my mind there was always question “what if..?”. But that was a scary thing to me if there was no god what will happen to us? how we will survive if people not afraid what they are doing sinful or unethical? if there is no afraid for bad persons to change their habits who can change them? If I have no power to change things or make my dreams come true who can do it other than me? So, I trust my mom about the existence of God. But during those late teens, I became rebellious, anarchist and of course atheist. I read many things about subjects from Marx, Engels, Thomas More ( Book utopia a must read for anybody) etc…

At the end, I changed again. Now I am deist. I cant tell you if God exist as a mean of religion but as a power that created everything, all universe, galaxies, stars and of course life here in this tiny world. I don’t believe that we are the only creatures living in this mega universe. All things surround our earth is not visual effects created by God to make us happy to loot at them. I am deterministic person more on the side of Einstein against Niels Bohr. I dont believe chance factor things happen. One day we will certainly sure on outcome of coin toss at the moment we flip it. The problem with chance that we tend to believe it when we can not explain it with our available information. After some time, we will have definite information about many things to eliminate all biases to believe the chance. So, you may ask, if you are scientific how you can believe a mighty power that you can not see or prove it? Here is my answer: In short of time, so many things happened consecutively to my life that I can not explain it by chance or scientifically. Only explanation for me is there is a power over me that it intervene my life heavily. I can not write down the details here, maybe one day, but only thing I can say it was like throwing dice 10 times and always dice stand on its edge and not stay flat to let the number came top :). If this power decided to play against me, I have no chance other than accept its existence and power…

PS: please check photo I attached, to find yourself in this universe. We are nothing just NOTHING…

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What are Finance and Economy? Part 1

How money developed to get all grips of our life without we notice while its so surreal? Hmm lets start with basics as we nearly forgot because of too much details have been push to front of our eyes and minds. Imagine that we are now living in an age with no money. Lets suppose we get and give items to others by exchanging the valuable things such as Gold or diamond. Why they are valuable? because they are scarce. You can not find them at just next corner to give them for exchange purpose. So, you need to spend time and energy to earn or find these scarce items. But what happened to this gold like exchange items today? They are disappeared nearly. Lets look how they lost their value and money gets their place while money as a printed document with no certain value.

Gold was very valuable before production for masses started. goldsmiths in England were the first banks. How they became bank? Their customers who were looking to keep their golden items were afraid of burglars and robbery. They know goldsmiths have vaults and they were good to keep in safe these precious items. So, they gave their golds to these goldsmiths to keep in safe for them and got a contract which was signed and detailed by the goldsmith. If he/she want take back their gold from goldsmith they just go there and show this certificate and exchange it with gold reserve of goldsmith. Of course, this pawn shop like business goldsmiths were doing working with some charges such as vault rent (first bank expense ;)). And people started to exchange their certificates with other people such as debt payment or heritage. This I guess gave clue to the vault owner goldsmiths as why we also create certificates such as that and issue to others as payment or loan. And this led to all financial crises we had!

Why this caused so much impact to the world, after this clever way of using these gold certificates? Because greed appeared in gold market. These certificates were became money like exchange items. First years I guess, they had exact values with the gold in the vault but some greedy goldsmiths issued these certificates so much even they were not holding enough gold to pay back these certificates to their owners. But market got bigger and bigger nobody certainly know if all certificates in market had exact exchange value. And its a risk took by goldsmiths that its not possible to all certificate owners come in same time and ask for their gold in keep. This reminds us the banking system collapses such as in deep depression.

But how these thing evolved to became finance world as we know? I will jump to gold standard of money without explaining small details of development of printed money. People accepted the value of printed money should be same as the gold value of the numbers on it like certificates we discussed above. somebody opened banks and invite people to bring their money to keep them safe from burglars. But same as goldsmiths, they used these customer accounts to develop other products to make business with their other customers money in vaults. Lets think this case: You have 100 dollars and you decided to keep it in safe away from potential thieves maybe from your relatives too. You go to bank and give money to them. They give you a certificate which shows you have 100 USD in their Bank. Good. You feel better and go home to have a good sleep. The bank now decide to use this money in their accounts they know that you will not come in very near future and ask back money. So in the streets somebody was looking for 100 USD to make business or invest or spend. He went to bank and ask if they can give him 100 USD or maybe bank invite them “Hey, anybody need 100 USD?”. So our loan seeker get what he wants. But bank should change him with some interest to make profit over this business deal. Suppose our loan guy decide to invest this money to another bank account which gives interest if you keep it in their vault (they need to make the business too). Your money now looks like as being in two bank accounts but it was only a 100 USD bill!. In banking system accounts, it has value of 200 USD. And our first bank decided to take some more money in their accounts to loan somebody. But they have only this loan certificate, with no actual money in their vaults. So they asked to another bank “would you mind to give us some money? for exchange we can give you our customer loan certificate” Bank accepted it but instead giving 100 USD they give to our first bank lets say 90 USD. Our first bank again go to ads and tell “Hey people do you want 90 USD?” And guess what happens? :). You know the story. Our 100 USD became only source of economy with huge value but in real just 100 USD.

Interestingly, this is not the end of our story. This is the simplest form of it. Big bank collects all of these loan certificates and put them in basket and ask for any willing customer with deep pockets to buy these loans in discounts or as a good interest earning chance better than saving account investment because loan interests are always high ;). Then if, another bank buys this, it can use it on bank account as collateral to take some credit from government or other bigger bank unions. its a big surprise that even printed money amount in circulation cannot keep pace with this amounts in the markets. Nobody knows who is the real owner the printed money while this printed money has no actual value in gold terms because of mass printing by central banks when governments need to buy debt of these banks which are connecting everything to our 100 USD guy. You are the responsible of all debts and infinite inflation!! :))

First Love

Same thing always happened to any one who believed the other side of love is same as us. But not..best way to go another country and start a new life I guess. I hope & pray for anyone not experience any one sided love ever.Its the biggest pain in the ass 🙂

The Fickle Heartbeat

When I first met my ‘first love,’ I was yet to have experienced any devastating heartbreak, so I was so vulnerably naive and excited to feel the butterflies in my stomach. Only if I had known that that feeling was the sign of the most heartless despair, I would’ve no doubt swayed away from this chapter of my life.

The anticipation for his name to appear on my phone screen or even a mere chance to “accidentally” bump into him gave me shivering hopes as a mean for ‘us’ to finally happen. Each phone call, each word, each smile he showed gave me uneasy yet delightful daydreams of that final day he would realize what a gem I am. And to my joy, ‘we’ happened. Without explicitly expressing my desperate feelings for him, my strategy of embedding my presence in his life worked and soon enough, we were labeled an…

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Why I am still single?

After some more bad relationship experiences, I decided to check what is problem with me and why I am so unsuccessful about women. I asked many people about what should I do? where I did mistake to this girl, that woman etc..I read many articles and lyrics of many songs that I believed there may be some clues I am missing.And here is my findings 🙂 :

• Self confidence: First I could not believe how many women mentioned this to me and its looks like magic formula to getting ropes of any woman you want if you have self confidence. They describe it as your walking, your posture, your sentences, your eyes, your face all gives clues to woman that if you have self confidence to take control any woman you want. For men, we describe these kind of men as jerks, assholes.. :). But its looks like it is not. Women love this too much. Even maybe only thing they asked. So what is the problem with me? When I was kid, I was very thin and weak I dont know maybe lack of interest of my mom to feed me 😉 But at the end, I was very weak to fight or stand against any bad things I faced. So this thing came with while I am growing. I was always thin and afraid of fights. I have not any father figure to even push me to work harder to get rid of this feeling. I was mom’s boy and no manly support from my dad even opposite happens: My dad never appreciate anything I did even he joked regularly wiht my relative successes like winning 2nd prize in a very big chess tournament in another country and his response was like “Huh, you couldnt became 1st..”.For other things I made mistakes, I closed my eyes to the realities of life and acted as a kid still in his teens and dreamed about how I will change things soon if I wait enough etc..But nothing changed and I am still acting as I am the most needy person in this country. I will change this. Checked!
• Physical  Appearance: Ok, lets start like this I am relatively short guy (1,69m) and I am feeling this in my bones 🙂 Everywhere I go, I see people are taller than me and even this makes me feel I am weaker than any body taller than me. All women I met, a way or other always giving hints as their dream man is tall like 1,85-1,90m and muscular, has 6 pack abs and some shaped chest muscles. Hmm, I cant get taller any more sure..So I decided to get fit to show that I have the potential. Now, when I look mirror I can see a real difference in my muscles that I have a good body much better than my friends or other people around me. But I am still Short!! I cant change it 🙂
• Wealth: This belief is much common between men. We always sure that women prefer rich guys and doesnt matter their personality or type. Yes, this is a bit true. But I think its connected with self confidence thingy. Why? Because, money shows two things to women as I understood after looong thinking and research about it. First it shows that this man is successful in life and this is why he is financially better than others. Second thing is these type of man are jerks (at least here in my country as we defined them). They have self confidence because of their success and money that have in their pockets or Bank accounts. This separated them from regular Johns. And as I told before, weak men always lose.
• Career: This thing you may call same as wealth case but a bit different. Women again see a good career man as a potential husband or mating candidate because his success in life is proof and he climbed the ladders better than others so he can give better DNAs to her child(eren). Good career depends on which sector you are. If you are in Academics, you should hold a title like Prof or PhD. No chance for academics with Master degree :). İf you are in Music, better you should have a famous band and you are leader of it. If not, your talent to sing or play any instrument also can give you an edge. Cause you are standing different than others around non talented guys. If you are in finance, advertising, industry etc.. you should hold a post like head of dept., manager etc.. No chance for weak
• Talent: If you have a particular talent such as drawing, playing music, gambling, writing, car or moto racing,  or any creative activity etc…can help you get women attentions. they appreciate the talent and see how other people around envy about his talent so its a competition for women to get that man before others. They are still look for potential mating partner for DNA transfer 😉

To finalize my brief analysis I will compare myself with successful ones. The issues I wrote above is a bit impossible for me now. Lets start with confident. I am feeling more confident now after I see other regular Johns. I am not the only one who was weak and bullied during childhood even by his dad :). I am now strong and my dad is afraid me I know. It changed, so everything may change in either direction. negatives may become positives. For Physical appearance, I am not tall and I will never be but being fit is in my control. I am doing sports regularly and I am enjoying I dont give a fuck if people see me muscular or not But I know I am good and much much healthier than others (my lab tests I am doing every six months show that I have nothing to worry ;)). Wealth thing,hmm this is a bit challenge. I started to work a bit harder and save some but I cant stop myself spending. I should change my spending habit. At nights, I am spending all money I managed to save, wasted on drinks at bars. I can change this and save enough to enjoy life pleasures more ;). For career, I have potential I know. After 4 universities degree with no problem to attain, now I am looking for my PhD and I am sure I can get it too easily. I am good at my job too. Only problem, I cant focus to develop career in certain area and its a bit hard to step over people who are also competing for posts. I may choose finance and focus on it but my current job force me to focus in research and statistics. I dont know but this area I know my strongest area :). For talent: I read some articles about if talent comes by birth or can be improved by practice. Researches show that you can develop a talent by practicing intensively. So again I must choose what talent I need to develop. Playing guitar I think has most potential. I have more than 10 years experience but never tried to play a song from start to finish. I can do that. Or writing maybe ;)…

Last reminder to me:  women want self confident, muscular, tall, rich, doctors guys 🙂

About Music in Northern Cyprus

Yesterday night, I was in Bedesten (St. Nicholas Church) to listen live concert of Leipzig ensemble AMARCORD by Pharo Foundation organization. It was a delightful experiment to listen such an ensemble with no other supportive instrument, just vocal choirs; 2 tenors, 1 baritone and 2 basses. I liked it specially there was no comas, no shaky voice controls, no timing errors, and good use of the venue to creating different echos.

But I am not writing about the event nor about music quality of the concert. Its about the people who came to listen! Most of them have no idea what is it nor what is happening?. People just behind me ( they were some Greek women who cant control themselves to not stay quiet. Always chuckling, whispering, playing with their phones (not in silent mode) or making noises by shuffling the booklet of the concert. It was an interesting thing for me to wait to the moment when they will be complete silence but not happened even for 30 seconds :). I am not talking only about these ladies, nearly all people around me can’t stop themselves to disturb the concert. Mobile phone rings (!!), coughs, dropping things around, chuckling, talking,…One moment I thought these people sent by some other group to sabotage the concert :). At another moment, ezan (Islamic prayer)  started just in the middle of the concert. Mosque was just next to the concert hall so you cant hear yourself while praying started in speakers loudly. Of course band stopped to wait the prayer finish without whispering even between themselves. Guess what people were doing at that moment! They started to laugh, talk  and joking about coincidence of timing of prayer. But for me, its a holy thing, holy singing (except one voice singing) like the ensemble performing. So people should respect to it like they are respecting the ensemble’s church songs! Interestingly Muslims ( they call themselves like this I guess) were the most enjoying ones for the moment. Those were the joke makers, laughter..Why? Do they embarrassed of the prayer or are they shamed of their religion and pretending to be like “we are also hating Islam etc..” No man! ı cant accept any of these things. If you cant stay quiet and respect for cultural things better stay at home or go to listen your pop songs in your car.

For other thing, Deep Purple concert previous Saturday. People went to concert to listen this once in a life time Rock concert for North Cyprus. But I did not go. Even I did not intend to attend. Why? I know people will go there and pretend like I am big Rocker and I like any Rock music, I can head bang hahah  🙂 etc…I wanted to ask those concert goers if they know any 2 album names of the Deep Purple or whether they heard the songs played there ever in their life except “Smoke on the water”. So, only thing I can say, they went there to be part of it without knowing what it is. I surprised to learn that some of my friends I believed that they have nothing with Rock music also were there and they surprised that why I didnt go to the concert. I lost my interest to Music here in North Cyprus because of our stupid musicians. They are actually not artist for me. Most of them just making cover music of popular songs and they are rubbish even for it. They are copy and paste musicians they cant create a song which I can call it has a story like intro, development and end. generally their own songs are copied from other famous bands or guitarists. I can hear even which part of which songs copied and pushed through their newly created song(!). They are just waste of energy.

Specially one band for me still smells shit. After nearly 25 years, this band only can make concerts with cover songs of other bands and acting like these were the biggest events of the North Cyprus Music scene and charging 10 Euros for concert tickets! like they are world famous band. Its interesting to listening them and still hearing many mistakes, wrong soloing, comas and out of note vocals etc..Okay, I am not good to play (I can play of course guitar lets say 10-13 notes per seconds 😉 this is why I can comment about the music quality) but please dont act like a big rock band and charge stupid amounts for these rubbish concerts. When I was in Istanbul, I went to the Do-Rock bar to drink some beers. There was a Band called “Electric Circus” playing there. No entrance fee just beers were 1 euro expensive than the other nights and they played from 20:00 till 02:00 with no stop and no mistake with hardest songs from Bon jovi, megadeth, pantera, dream theater, iron maiden etc…

Why this is important to me? Because the band I was talking above who are bad on concerts, can only cover 7-8 songs in 2 hours and rest for another 1 hour and come back to hall again for 2 songs to finish. And always their concert starts minimum 1 hour late!! Even Deep purple announced that their concert will start at 21:30 and it started exactly on that time 🙂 Our bands, I guess, are thinking we are completely fool! I am not and I wont be. Our poor people thinking they are very good on music because they have no idea what is music or being a musician like listeners I mentioned above for Choir ensemble. Other musicians are also same. They caught people in this isolated island with no idea what is music and being musician and they are really fucking people by charging stupid amount of money for music teaching and concerts. Who the hell they are? Do they contribute any song to the international community? can they write a song which is purely original? Do they have any talent which may be accepted internationally?? Of course there are some talented musicians here in North Cyprus. Many of them are my friends. I appreciate what they are doing by themselves. But I am saying these to all musicians here in North Cyprus: please be yourself and act as your quality. Dont make me angry I dont want to get involve creating music to show you 😉 I have many things to do nowadays but music maybe some other time…

Why we need the open ballots?

A vote is a formal expression of an individual’s choice in voting, for or against some motion (for example, a proposed resolution), for a certain candidate, a selection of candidates, or a political party. A secret ballot has come to be the practice to prevent voters from being intimidated and to protect their political privacy (source: wikipedia).  When there is an election in any country to choose the right candidates to govern, the voters generally ( I guess, always) vote in secrecy (Secret Ballot). I am not sure any more about protecting political privacy. The candidacy for govern, first of all, is assuming the taking responsibility to controlling and directing the state. When he/she is asking power to giving him/her by the voters, we assumed as voters that this person has ability to use power to serve to the community in best. But of course we have different opinions about persons’ abilities and priorities. These beliefs might be shaped with our instincts or by the candidate’s promises and personality showing. So we act differently on voting. Of course generally voters find common ground and choose the right political candidate with their beliefs. The voters who are not share same beliefs on the chosen candidate (or political party) must accept the results and obey the new comers’ political actions and govern. This is democracy. But I don’t understand how a community give such a huge power to a person to rule and presents everybody’s thoughts about actions we need to improve quality of our life.

If you ask any person whether he wants to become king or the president of the country probably he/she gonna think as “Wow, it should be amazing! I can control everybody and do anything I want. I can have immense wealth…”. If ,as a voter, I don’t believe the chosen person or party has enough skills or political road map to solve the problems of the community, how any one force me to accept the wrong actions ( for myself, indeed) done by the governors. They are not represents my thoughts and believes that community needs. Okay, lets say we should accept this to regulate our daily life and not being in political chaos forever. But for me, most important part comes here! The voters who chose the person or party also should accept the responsibility of the actions done by this person or party. If he/she or party is corrupt and wasted sources that should be spend for community benefit (such as social security; health, job creation, child and shelter support etc..) why on earth the voters who didn’t share the same idea on voting day also should accept the bad govern results?

Here is my thinking; First, there should be no more secret ballot for political elections. Everyone should know who voted who? Why we need to protect the political views of persons in a well developed democracy? Are we afraid that we will not get the services provided by the state? are we afraid of discrimination because of our political view, not actions!? So if we believe these, this is not a democracy as they say, this is completely discrimination! After a political corruption by the chosen ones, we will accept as we always did “Okay, everybody is doing, he/she also did, but what we can do to stop these things? there is no way to stop corruption”. When and how we will get back our sources and time wasted by these chosen ones? Or why we share the consequences as non voters to these persons or parties? Enough questions. Lets do the regulation as this as fantasy: Voters who chose the persons or parties to govern should also share the corruption blames. In a court (if there is any caught corrupt politician available), these corrupts and their voters should share the ruling by their involvement part. As a voter of course, their involvement very little, but in any monetary fine shared by the voters, I believe will have huge impact on voters after this no matter how much they have to pay. After these kind of rulings, voters probably going to think twice and have an eye always on their candidate.

We should never forget this: We as people choose democracy to improve our lives by letting the skilled ones to govern the state. They are our representatives. Not our rulers! They should behave accordingly to this fact. As taxes we pay, we pay their wages, we give them power to change things that are wrong or ineffective. So, we have the power and sources to give them and take back as people of our communities. Without us, they are simple persons. Dont put these people on the peak of Olympus. They are mortal and have humanly weaknesses as we have. We should improve our thinking of democracy and our governors. They are becoming idols other than simple life forms. No one is above your life 😉

“If a woman you…

“If a woman you like, asks for a help or favor it is time to go away. You have not carrying any value on her eyes”

Women can’t afford to lose their loved ones by asking help in case of no help they get. But they can feel your emotional weaknesses on them and use it

Get rid of your love

Today, I woke up as usual at just before 07:00 and opened all windows of my bedroom to see how is weather. Again sun filled lights to my room. Then just tidied up bed and run to watch TV and get ready. At 07:20, went out to walk to my work when weather is good. I picked up my Latte on the road and sipped through the road to workplace. When I arrived, as regular, checked emails, read BBC news, twits..Then checked my bank account to see how much growth I gained in my funds after 2 days break ;). After, I started to work and randomly rechecked news site, twits to see if there is any breaking news or interesting things to read. Suddenly, I realized my life is going very well with no big stress or emotional breaks… After 4 months break from my only love, all stress and sadness is gone. Even when we together, I was stressing too much envying her or wondering when I will get a call or message from her. But after she gone, slowly everything started to look more interesting and beautiful. My head is empty like blue sky and feeling wonderful. Three years I spent to build up this relation and all I am now understanding, it was just giving head and heart aches to me.

Now, I am free! I dont spend time for thinking her or how I can make her happy by doing this or that surprises, which presents should I buy, where we can go to amaze her etc…During this 4 months, I improved myself too much now I can see. First, my bank balance increased nearly 2.5 times in 4 Months ( I don’t think it will grow so quickly like this anymore but who knows)! Why? Cause I canalized my energy to improve it by working harder and think more efficiently to cut costs in my daily life. Then, I am feeling better than ever. I am doing my daily sport (gym, running) with nothing on my mind. It helps to shape my body very well ( few months to 6 packs), I am proud of it now :). Plus to all this, I am not giving a f@ck to any relation, not any more looking to find some one. I changed my style too! Now, I growth beard and wearing more stylish after kiddish clothes choices(t-shirts, sport shoes, different patterned colorful things…) I loved to wear. So, end of this love issue really helped to spend time to myself. At the end, why we should waste our life for some one?? I have my own life and choices to make me happy. If loved one is doesnt waste her/his, So dont destroy yours. I will live only one life and no one cant take it from me! 🙂

12 Little Known Laws Of Karma (that Will Change Your Life)

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universal law of karma

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What is Karma? Karma is the Sanskrit word for action. It is equivalent to Newton’s law of ‘every action must have a reaction’. When we think, speak or act we initiate a force that will react accordingly. This returning force maybe modified, changed or suspended, but most people will not be able eradicate it.

12 Little Known Laws of Karma (That Will Change Your Life)This law of cause and effect is not punishment, but is wholly for the sake of education or learning.

A person may not escape the consequences of his actions, but he will suffer only if he himself has made the conditions ripe for his suffering. Ignorance of the law is no excuse whether the laws are man-made or universal.

To stop being afraid and to start being empowered in the worlds of karma and reincarnation, here is what you need to…

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“Why only good,…

“Why only good, harmless people dying in young age while baddest lives in joy”